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As the significant other, you will not get more details than necessary on anything unless you poke and prod. Related: The unconventional relationship is the norm in the military. However, in the civilian world, or in a relationship, it may be a little hard to deal with. Especially if he is coming from a higher rank, it may be increasingly difficult for him to “fall in line” with civilian life. Not every soldier comes home with post-traumatic stress.
It is a lot of work to break down those barriers and gain enough trust for him open up and be vulnerable. You need to understand this and realize how difficult it is. However, for those who do, there is nothing wrong with that.
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This is based solely on the experiences of my veteran friends, as well as my own with a past paramour. The military teaches service members to trust their unit, and few others. If he comes to you with a problem, chances are he’ll talk about it until he no longer wants to and then go into lockdown. That is not a good thing or a bad thing, that is just a matter of fact and something you need to understand. Military men are used to their band of brothers, and are bred to be loyal and protective. Some branches of the military (I’m looking at you, Marines) have a feeling of superiority over others.
Our membership base is made of up of over 600,000 (and growing) civilians and singles in the army, navy, air force, coast guard, marines and various other military organizations based around the world.Are you trying really hard not to ruffle his “commitment feathers” by asking him how he feels about you?Are you, instead, trying your best to show him what a great catch you are by being the sweet, fun-time, easy-breezy gal on the outside (even if you are crumbling with worry and insecurity on this inside)?Editor’s Note: This article originally appeared at Cellar Door, the personal blog of Gabrielle Puglia. You need to understand that the military is a brotherhood.There have been a few articles about the pros and cons of dating the Generation Y military man, and while some of them are better reads than others, I felt the need to weigh in. Military men may never have closer relationships than those they made in the military.